True Colours

Ran into an old friend/colleague of mine recently. Stopped for a short chat, your usual small talk, and goodbyes. Once upon a time, this guy use to call me everyday and night, when he owes banks money which he can't pay and he's receiving letters from the banks' solicitors threatening to krupt him. He was desperate. I can honestly say that at that time, I was in deeper shit than he is, the difference is I live within my means and I managed the "shit". But I'm not one to see a friend in need and turn a blind eye, so I agreed to lend him some money out of my own very limited resources.

What happened next is unreal.

We were at work, so he said he'll drive me out now to a nearby ATM so I can withdraw the money. Fine. We walked to the carpark, and there he was with his sporty black Honda Civic with nice sports rims shining under the moonlight.

"Nice set of wheels", I said.
"...."
"how much per month?"
"800+"
"Can you afford that with your current situation?"
"....erm... I can't do without it, I have to send my mum for medical appointments"
I was like, hello, your mum goes to the doctor everyday? Ever heard of a thing call taxi?
"So when can you pay me back the money?"
"......."
"?!"
"..............."
"OK, just call me and let me know when its convenient for you k?"
nod

A few months later, he got a fat retrenchment package, cleared his debts with the banks, and totally disappeared for awhile. It was like complete radio silence. Till now. He was chatting away as if nothing ever happened. Obviously, he has chosen to conveniently forget that he owed me. Why do people keep doing these things, pretending as if something didn't happen. If he had been up front with me and tell me he can't or won't be paying me back, I would have gladly written it off there and then, no problem, no grudges.

As the saying goes, A Friend in Need is A Friend Indeed. How true.

When they needed help, I'm more than willing to go out of my way to do whatever I can, doing all the fetch and carry, spending time and money on them, even if it means burning a small hole in my pocket. But what is truly amazing and disappointing is how easily these friends forget when they don't need you anymore.

I always felt that the true measure of a person is by how he reacts when he makes a mistake, rather than by the mistake itself, cos everybody makes mistakes. Do you admit the errors of your way and make a sincere apology? Do you pretend you did nothing wrong? Or worse, complicate things by trying to convince yourself and others that you are the victim instead? (I have this one weird experience, but I hope I won't be forced into telling it here)

But at the end of the day, you get to see the true colours of someone before its too late, I think it is resources well spent. Good riddance, I say.